70+ History pick up lines and rizz

Listen up, my history buffs and charismatic chronologists! We all know the key to any successful romantic pursuit lies in creatively capturing your quarry’s imagination and curiosity. What better way to achieve that than skipping the played-out flirtation flowcharts and dropping some next-level rizz steeped in world-shaping events and legacies instead?

These carefully curated history pick-up lines are guaranteed to get those cerebral juices flowing while flashing your impressive cultural depth and wit. An intellectual foreplay flex trumping any sadsal’s prepubescent gym banter hands down. So whether looking to bed Helen of Troy or spit rizz at Cleopatra herself, these headscratchers are about to rewrite the historical annals of seduction as we know it.

The Ancient Antiquity Era:

Hey girl, they say the rain in ancient Mesopotamia was crazy unpredictable. How about we find ourselves a ziggurat and wait out the next downpour…together? 😉

I see you eyeing me like one of Ramses II’s side chicks. Keep playing coy and maybe I’ll let you be my royal concubine too.

Did it hurt? When you got reincarnated and kept forgetting how insanely beautiful your previous self was?

Is your name Isis? Because you’re the goddess resurrector of my heart’s most primal papyrus scrolls.

I must have been a slick Greek sculptor in another lifetime. How else could I chisel perfection this immaculate at bringing exquisite feminine forms back to life?

Classical Greece/Rome Period:

My philosophy needs you like Plato needed Socrates. Come help explore my favorite logical fallacies over some Dionysian debauchery?

Did you invent democracy? Because your supreme authority over my body politic has me begging to be ruled.

They say Rome wasn’t built in a day. But you can totally dismantle my empire’s defenses overnight if you really put that derriere into it.

Know what would look really nice around your gorgeous neck? My Gordian Knot…just let me locate its ends first.

I may not be Odysseus, but it’d still take me at least a decade to chart every tantalizing peninsula across your Mediterranean coast.

The Rise of Islam & Spread of Monotheism:

Do you happen to follow one of those newfangled monotheistic faiths? Because you’ve got damn divinity written all over you, habibi.

I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but I’m starting to think Muhammad spread Islam so future guys like me could fall spiritually prostrate to maidens like you.

Yo ma, we were a couple of infamous Hashshashins in a past life for sure. You ready to experience getting high off my dagger hilts again?

Girl, you make this shepherd want to revise his whole understanding of paradise with your celestial radiance and all. Say we find a quiet corner and pray on it together?

Who needs frankincense and myrrh when your intoxicating aura is all the blessings this poor soul needs? Let me pay tribute to your intoxicating holiness, ya Yahwistic queen.

Medieval European Renaissance:

Damn princess, how about dispensing with this chivalry pretext already? Come re-introduce some XXXtra raunchy behavior into these Dark Ages.

I may be a crude commonborn peasant, but your elegant nobility single-handedly inspires a renaissance of my most sacred bodily functions.

Stay the path you’re on, noble maiden – and you’ll reach the Valhalla of explosive mortal pleasures I have in store before this day is through.

If I were a monastic friar, girl, I’d purposely take sacrilegious vows just to absolve my unforgivable thoughts around you.

Real talk – was the whole feudal system just an elaborate Renaissance AF metaphor for your imminent rule over this conquered heart?

Imperial Age of Exploration:

Your curves have me sailing seaward further than any of Magellan’s expeditions. Care to let this humble sailor dock his sails in your secret cove tonight?

You ever heard of El Dorado, goddess? Because mapping the valleys of your prized geography would hypothetically make me richer than all of Cortes’ plundered Aztec spoils.

Funny seeing you here – I could’ve sworn I enlisted with Hernán Cortés just to topple empires as monumental as that figure you’re rocking.

thinks hard Okay, hear me out here…what if we traveled the ancient Silk Road together, except fully nude and draped in all the ornate damasks our camels could carry?

Sorry, was I just gawking too hard? Couldn’t stop fantasizing about what it’d feel like to stake my flag in your stupendomega New World soil for King and Country.

The Enlightenment Period:

Hey cultured one, what would it take to get you to administer some private tutoring in the ways of carnal knowledge this evening? I’ll study your Anatomy with utmost devotion.

My philosophy needs a hot ally like you to help test its daring hypotheses. What say we journey to the outer limits of earthly pleasures tonight? You know, for scientific posterity’s sake?

I must have climate change on the brain, because surveying your lavish physical topography has me perspiring like an Englishman in Bombay. Care to join me in shedding restricting garments?

You’re the only reason I still adhere to Newtonian physics. No way your gravitational pull on all my bodily particles is just a theory.

We may not end up revolutionizing the world tonight. But judging by seismic splendor before me, the aftershocks rocking our bed are bound to alter realities across the known universe.

The Modern Industrial Age:

I know it’s the 1800s and everything, but your timeless beauty makes me want to fire up America’s smokestack industries and just build a time machine already. Come forth to the future with me, duchess?

Okay, I’ll cut straight to it – I’m straight up the Andrew Carnegie of seduction. Give me one night to monopolize your affections, and I’ll cornerhusker your luscious continental railroad like it’s going out of style.

Hey sorry, do I know you from a past life? You just have one of those faces destined to launch a thousand steamboats in permanent devotion.

Breaker breaker, this is Mulebody requesting permission to trespass your caboose and make sumptin fierce clang tonight over?

Look at us, a couple of grimy robber barons already. Say we scurry off somewhere and consolidate our strangleholds on each other’s…uh…assets? Best two-banger of the night takes all.

20th Century / Modern Era:

Heard it’s the future out there and they’ve finally achieved world peace. Thank SCIENCE, because this anti-bomb you jussst dropped on me is about to completely destabilize the erotic order worldwide.

Ma’am, for your protection and mine, I’m gonna need those toxic shapely assets you’re harboring safely contained and covered at all times. We’re talking potential superpower spillage if this sultry nuclear tango goes critical.

According to NASA, the Phoenix lander just discovered water frozen beneath the surface of Mars. Does that mean you’ve been the red planet’s elusive alien goddess all along?

Hiya potential vector, this is Patient Zero requesting emergency quarantine protocol. Your hotness is too contagious for general population exposure…need to isolate your pandemic curves immediately.

This coronavirus outbreak definitely sucks, but at least Mother Earth’s getting a much-needed reprieve from mankind’s rapacious dating rituals. Maybe we should keep social–distancing these pants of ours apart indefinitely too?

The Hypothetical Future:

Are you the Terminator robot assassin Skynet sent to off me or the human resistance member here to preserve our species? Either way, let’s work on repopulating asap.

Hey beautiful, quick question – did the multiverse continuum schism partway through the sixth dimension again? No other logical explanation for someone as radiant as you winding up here.

You’re clearly not from around these parts of the cosmos…care to show a lonely time-drifter like myself around your trans-dimensional neighborhood sometime?

When the metaverse mainframe completes its compression upload, can I download you into my permanent sensory matrix for offline personal backups?

Something’s clearly gone haywire in the proper flow of light cone continuity. Such an ethereal chronological transfer beam like yourself shouldn’t still be unspoken for in this godsforsaken corner of space-time.

Key Takeaways:

• Fully leaning into your geeky passions while flirting unlocks wormholes of intellectual fizzion no lusting goldfish can compete with

• Weaving rich historical context into pickup lines demonstrates thoughtful creativity while letting you showcase relevant knowledge

• Framing intergalactic celestial forces as conspiring towards ushering in your desired romantic outcomes makes shooting your shot feel written in the stars

• Well-timed, over-the-top sci-fi tech and time-paradox references lend an air of intellectual mystique often irresistibly enchanting to the right kinds of prospects

• Above all, staying playful and avoiding supernova desperation while putting intellectual flourishes on otherwise lewd come-ons heightens the fun chase versus cringe downward spirals

So there you have it, amorous academics – the definitive modern sextant helping us all navigate the perilous seas of wooing humanity’s most brilliant and bewitching across all space-time continuums. Now scramble forth with your newfound chrono-charisma and get to unearthing those hidden historical treasures, you ancient rogues!